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TA Library Recon. 
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Post TA Library Recon.
This is as far as I got tonight, it is more or less a work in progess, I'll finish it tommorow but this is what I have until then.

I feel that it is a vast improvement on my writing style but could still use some work so any advice will probably be taken.

********

“You know your orders, and you know what to do. Now go.” The black mass of goo swirled about and turned from the other, more solid monster before it slid off next to a pile of bonelike pieces in the corner of the storage room. It turned back to face the other, its yellow eyes glaring almost angrily. “, and shut the door on the way out would you?”

“Yes sir.” The other monster, a large dark green mass of tentacles with a distinctive white eye in the what might have been the center, slid back slightly and closed the door before heading back down the maintenance hall. A moment later it had climbed up the stairs and out of the basement and around the corner into what was a locker room engulfed in shiny blue goo. Among the goo were several of their female human captives naked, bound into the walls, floor and some even held on the ceiling. They were bound in a variety of ways with black binding goo used to keep them subdued, some of the more unruly ones were gagged and some blindfolded with the same.

The monster slid across the room to a group of others of his kind who were handling one of the girls whose hands were bound behind her while she was gagged and blinded with the black goo, laughing as they tossed her between each other watching her try to keep her balance and struggle helplessly as she panicked. It was a game they liked to play, the more the girl struggled and panicked, the tighter and stronger the black goo would try to hold her and getting her worked up was a way of forcing the poor girl into further entrapping herself. One of the monsters, a blue mass of slick tentacles grabbed her as she staggered his way.

“Do you think she might get away?” His tentacles roamed her slick body as he teased her before tossing her in the direction of another.

“I don’t know. She might try to run off while she thinks we’re not looking” Laughed the red one; the thinner, speedier looking of the three. “Maybe we ought to keep her on a tight leash” he said sliding a tentacle around her neck like a collar before unwinding and sending her staggering in the direction of the third, bigger, dark gray monster. He grabbed the girl and held on. His slimy, more bulky appendages began to wrap around her, constricting the terrified girl in his wet grasp.

“I don’t think we’ll have to worry about her going anywhere.” He chuckled. His muscular limbs both cradled and explored her naked body. One of his limbs held her chin up to him while another found its way in between her exposed legs, immediately feeling her hold still in fright. “You’re going to be a good little slut and do as your told, aren’t you?”

“…mmph” The girl nodded slowly, even behind the black goo over her mouth and eyes her expression was clearly worried.

“Good slave, you’ll find that if you simply submit and give in that life here will be much easier and… much more pleasurable” His limb began to rub between the girl’s legs. It was slow, but the limb was very strong, it must have been almost pure muscle. It worked its way up and down at first. The slime from the tentacle coupled with the wetness building up from her pussy was making the area slick. A second later the muscle changed motions and began moving inward, the tentacle pressing into her. The motion of the tentacle began to elicit soft cries from the girl as her knees began to buckle form the sensation.

“mmmmph…” the girl moaned out behind her gag. It was hard to say if it was in worry or in welcoming. Perhaps some of both. Her breath deepened as the tentacle began to go in more deeply, writhing inside her. “mmph!” the girl looked panicked but there was nothing she could do to stop it and her willingness to resist was fading. The muscle began to move back and forth at a good pace. The girl’s breathing quickened to match the rate of the movement in her sex.

“mmhhh... mmmhhhhhh…” the girl’s back began to arch as the muscle’s unyielding drive in and out of her brought her to climax. “mmhhh!” she let out one last cry as she came around the bulging tentacle imbedded in her cunt.

“See? Doesn’t giving in feel good?” said the grey thing that held her as the others watched in satisfaction.

“mmmph…” the girl hung her head and pouted in defeat. It was so unfair that this thing had brought her such torment only to then give her such pleasure and she could do nothing to stop it or run away. The gray monster looked as if it was about to hand her over to one of the others when the dark green monster interrupted.

“I wish you three had time for that but we have an assignment” said the dark green monster. The three of them looked disappointed; the girl on the other hand felt a wave of relief wash over her as her body shuddered with nervousness. “Don’t worry it shouldn’t be too hard or take very long. It’s reconnaissance, you’ll like It.” said the dark green mass.

“So how is old ‘bag-a-bones’?” asked the large grey monster.

“I think he gets tired wearing that old battle armor all the time, he wasn’t wearing it when I saw him. But don’t let him catch you calling him that, you know he hates that name and how he gets when others say it.” Replied the dark green monster.

“Why does he always wear that old armor anyway? I mean don’t get me wrong, there’s not much that’s stronger than Reaperbone but there’s not a lot that’s heavier either.” said the red one.

“Yeah but even with it on he’s still quicker than you, isn’t he?” chucked the blue monster at the red.

“If you three have had enough, we have an assignment to complete.” The monsters looked about each other before each began to head off one after the other. The girl they had been tormenting listened for the last of them to leave before taking a deep breath of relief. She tried shifting back into one of the corners of the room before something wrapped around one ankle and then the other.

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you, little one.” came the voice of the grey one that had held her before. “I’ll be back with you shortly to give you your reward for learning your place. You did learn your place here, didn’t you slut?” the voice growled as a tentacle slid its way through her legs and the muscular appendage began to rub the girl’s tight sex again. All the girl could do was nod her head helplessly back at the voice.

“Good girl, then I’ll leave you where I can get back to you. We wouldn’t want you to get ‘misplaced’ now would we?” With that, the tentacles lifted her up in the air holding her upside down. A moment later she felt her ankles come together and the bottom of her feet level against the ceiling. She felt binding goo engulf her feet, go past her knees and slide all the way up to her thighs. She felt the binding goo holding her wrists together behind her attach to the ooze around her thighs, keeping her from bending herself upright in any way. She was now left dangling from the ceiling in goo, aside from her legs and hands she was naked and completely exposed. Being upside down was also disorienting and the blindfold made it even worse.

“I’ll see you later then” said the voice before finally leaving her.

“mmmph!” the poor girl cried.

........

“So where does the commander need us to scout that so important?” asked the blue mass of tentacles following next to the green one. It was hard to tell where its voice was coming from exactly.

“The library, the commander says that’s where the next stage will begin so everything has to go smoothly, no mistakes or loose ends.” The green answered as he opened up a duct in the hallway ceiling and crawled inside. How his whole mass was able to fit would have been a surprise and mystery to anyone who was not one of his kind.

“What are our orders, exactly?” asked the grey monster following slowly into the duct.

“We are to observe and detail the area, we must remain unseen at all times. We are to plant traps at ambush locations and, if we can, we are to grab one of the females and return with her so she can be questioned. That is all.” The green mass slid silently inside the duct as he spoke just loud enough to be heard by the others.

“Questioned… sure” chuckled the elongated body of the red monster in the duct.

“Quiet, we’re almost there.” The white eye of the green monster peered out behind the slotted duct at the top of the library wall and looked out over the room. “Ok, spread out. Blue, Grey you head in that direction, Red see if you can’t make your way over there.”

The monsters spread out silently in different directions to gain different vantage points. After only a few minutes they had regrouped at the main duct.

“Reports?” the green monster asked, eyeing the others. “I see several exits so ambushing is going to be key. I counted six, young human females. One is an aid behind the counter, there are three at the tables in the middle and two are together browsing the shelves, correct?” Blue and Grey agree with the observation.

“Seven” grinned the lean red monster, or at least what might be called grinning “I counted all six of those, nice specimens too, but there’s a tiny little thing on the far side of the library, right next to a vent near the floor and behind many shelves. She’d make an easy grab.”

“Very good, Red and since you saw her first you can have the honor of catching her” ordered the dark green monster “we’ll start laying out traps.” He, Blue and Grey went to work. The red monster returned through the ducts to the other side of the Library, sure enough it was isolated and well hidden. The girl sitting there was a small, short brown haired girl with glasses quietly reading a book. Despite her small size she was reasonably well endowed, her c-cups coming forth from her chest tucked under her blouse.


****
so yes it's a work in progress and I'm sorry to cut it short but it's late and I'm tired right now so I'm calling it a night. I just felt like posting it before I head off to bed since it has been... a while since I've posted anything story wise...

oh well I'll get back to it tommorow and I will almost certainatly finish it by then. Later.... :mrgreen:


Sun Jul 17, 2011 12:24 am
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
Well, it's great to see someone else finally writing. :D

The story looks pretty good. Well, it could use some editing perhaps, but then practice makes perfect. ;) The idea is all right. Although...it's funny, in "your version" of the school, there seem to be more girls around than in "my version". I had it in my head that nearly everyone had gone home already. Therefore, there were only a few girls scattered around the school...(Or does that contradict the fact that I had so many girls popping up in my stories already?) Anyway, I would have put one, maybe two girls in the library.

That's not a criticism, though, merely an observation. ;) Actually, it could be fun to have a big scene where lots of characters are running around...kinda like the "tutorial capture" scene. Or, since you mentioned "traps", that sounds like an interesting idea. I say, go ahead and develop all the traps and see how the girls get caught in them. ;)

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Sun Jul 17, 2011 8:47 pm
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
TentacleSpecialist wrote:
Although...it's funny, in "your version" of the school, there seem to be more girls around than in "my version".


yes well in my school days quite a few people would stay a school for some time before heading home and depending on the size of the school (usually acadmies are quite large) there may be many people involved in after school activities.

Really though this was more of a 'setting the stage' piece for you to develop if you ever wanted to. I tried to keep it interesting and will continue to do so as I write it.

The 'traps' I had thought about might include (but aren't essentially limited to):
*Sticky traps
-Surface trap - a surface is covered with a sticky slime that acts like flypaper
-Goobomb - when an unsuspecting human draws too close they are hit with a blast of black goo, immediatly binding them and trapping them in place (similar to how Ishmail caught Autumn)
*Monster traps
-Tentacle trap - several slimy tentacles sneek up on a victim and grab hold before subduing them
-Bubble trap - a trap that absorbs the victim into a large, clear bubble container where they are restriced and immobilized by tentacles inside the bubble. The bubble can be picked from (and re-attached to) it's stalk like a fruit with the subdued victim inside to more easily transport.
-Mask trap - also known as a submission mask, it's a wicked little tool that can act as a trap that is made of a thin layer of shiny black flesh that clings to the victims face, both blindfolding, plugging their ears and gagging them. It can allow any of these sense to be returned at any time depending on the bigger monster controlling it. They also can control thier victim's air supply if the victim continues to struggle against her captors while the mask is still on.

These are just a few ideas and I'm sorry for not adding anything story wise at the moment. I got sidetracked tonight. I promise I will finish it soon though. :mrgreen:


Sun Jul 17, 2011 11:49 pm
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
Well, it sounds like you've been putting a lot of thought into it. I'll be interested to see what happens next. ;)

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Mon Jul 18, 2011 12:06 am
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
Tali took a moment to write a note on a piece of paper before returning to her textbook. Staying after hours in the library was typical of her, it was usually more quiet there and easier to focus and for this particular afternoon she was a little relieved to have some privacy. She turned the page of her Psychology book to the next section, Chapter 10: Human Sexuality. In class most of the other girls giggled when the teacher assigned the reading, but Tali was more curious about the particulars of what might be in this chapter. The first few sections talked about sexual orientation and affiliation, concepts of attraction, one part mentioned Freud’s influence into the study of the field –mostly trivial aspects. Tali wrote her notes and felt her curiosity diminish; the book didn’t seem to discuss what she thought it would. She turned the page and suddenly she felt her interest pique again. The heading read “Sexual Fetishes and Human Arousal” and the page included several pictures off to the side all very mild, nothing outwardly inappropriate but still quite attention-grabbing.

Tali bit her lip as she scanned the pages. While most of the descriptions were very textbook and didn’t go into much detail, Tali couldn’t help but let her mind wander about playing with the ideas as she read. While she had never really tried any of the things she read about she had always had a fascination with them and a desire to connect with them more, though just looking at her you might never had guessed. She was usually too shy to talk to most people and always dressed conservatively compared to the other girls some of whom teased her for it. Tali looked through the text as it described several fetishes, all the while she let her thoughts travel. She thought about being tied up when she read about bondage and while the idea was an interesting one she was also fascinated with the other role, the one doing the tying up. She read about other things like latex and rubber, shoes and feet, dominance and submission. She stopped reading once the list became a bit too outlandish and just plain weird. Tali took a few notes and sighed. She thought about how nice it would be if she were in control for once, if others were taking notes for her, if she were the dominant one doing all the teasing. It almost felt…

Her thoughts were interrupted by a voice.

“Like what you see there?” it echoed out. Tali jumped to close the book and looked around but could see nothing.

“Um… who’s there?” she said in a weak voice.

“I said do you like what you see in there?” said the voice again. Where was it coming from?

“Well I… um well…” Tali continued to look around nervously “maybe a little, I find it interesting but…”

“Interesting enough to want to try it?” said the voice again. Tali looked to the air vent in the wall next to her, it was… coming from there? It was just big enough for a person to fit in there but it couldn’t have been one of the girls, the voice was too deep for it. She peered into the slats hoping to see something.

“Well… maybe. Um… yes. But who are you? Are you just trying to play another trick on me?” Tali asked into the darkness behind the vent.

“You’re not the most popular little thing are you?” said the voice.

“Well…” Tali didn’t want to admit it out so openly but… “no, I’m not… I used to get picked on but I keep quiet most of the time now so most of the other girls just ignore me.”

“Sounds like you could use some friends… and we could always use someone like you.” Tali was confused by this.

“’We’?” she replied. Slowly a figure immerged from behind the vent. It was red and slick and looked like it had about two dozen arms of some kind attached an elongated body with a bright yellow slitted eye on one end about the size of a small plate but the thing itself wasn’t small at least not up-close, it could easily have been twice her size.

“Yes little one, there are others like me –here in this very school. Many others; and we would love to have you join us.” It’s… expression, seemed to smile. Tali was both shocked and intrigued by the creature and it’s strange offer when a thought crossed her mind.

“Do I… have a choice?” she asked.

“Hehe, I like you little one, you’re quite clever.” His slender arms slid through the vent with ease and removed the cover before slipping their way loosely around Tali. “No… I suppose you don’t have a choice but you CAN choose how…” Tali considered for a moment, as the tentacles continued to wrap around her. There was no way she could run and that would only serve to make this thing angry.

“Ok, I’ll join you… what do I have to do?” She answered nervously. The tentacles began leading her into the air duct with them. She gulped but knew better than to resist now.

“It’s easy, you’ll come with me and you’ll get to meet others like me along the way. Then you can tell us all about your school and everyone who goes here and other things we might ask you. Then we’ll help you get adjusted to working with us.” chimed the red creature as it continued to drag her away. By now the vent cover had been shut behind her by its slender arms all she could do was let it carry her off.

“I see, and… HEY!” Tali quickly brushed a tentacle that had wandered up in between her legs, it was slick and wet and difficult to remove right away.

“Sorry.” the thing laughed “Though with a body like yours, can you blame me for getting a little carried away?”

“What? I didn’t… but… wait you think I’m-” Tali began to go off before a tentacle wrapped itself around her mouth, silencing her.

“You are quite pretty, little one. I’m sorry if no one has ever told you that.” The words made Tali blush “Now be quiet for now. We’ve quite a bit of distance to travel and you said you’d behave. Of course, if you don’t want to behave you can receive an entirely different treatment.” the red thing holding her relaxed its grip enough to let her speak.

“Right, I-I’m sorry, um… I don’t even know what to call you…” Tali whispered

“You can call me Red, since it fits so well don’t you think?” Red joked “What are you called, little one?”

“My name’s Tali” replied the girl.



****
sorry it took so long to post, I got caught up in a lot of other things.
I'll finish this up sometime this week ...maybe this weekEND. We'll see.


Fri Jul 29, 2011 10:39 pm
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
Interesting, interesting...I think, in terms of storytelling, she gives in too easily. See, when you're writing a story, if everything is just "Do this" "Okay" then...it doesn't grab the reader and pull them in. It needs conflict.

(It's entirely possible that the same criticism could be levelled at some of my stories. I don't consider myself a hypocrite if I admit that I made a mistake. >_> )

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Sat Jul 30, 2011 10:16 pm
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
How I read that post
by Gouger

::::

TentacleSpecialist wrote:
Interesting, interesting...I think, in terms of storytelling, she gives in too easily.


what the... I got the idea to do it this way from your stories...

TentacleSpecialist wrote:
See, when you're writing a story, if everything is just "Do this" "Okay" then...it doesn't grab the reader and pull them in. It needs conflict.


again? now hold on just a darn minute! I-

TentacleSpecialist wrote:
(It's entirely possible that the same criticism could be levelled at some of my stories. I don't consider myself a hypocrite if I admit that I made a mistake. >_> )


-oh... well there you have it.


When I had initially drafted this part, it was another "sneak up behind some unsuspecting girl and rape her" bit... but I decided that I should switch it up some and try something different. I didn't include anything really explicit in this one but instead set it up for more interesting development later. Anyway I'll work on it some more some other time. For now the Library is free for you to use if you want, do whatever you like with it.


Sun Jul 31, 2011 7:50 pm
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Post Re: TA Library Recon.
Heh. ^_^; Well, first of all, I don't consider my writing to be perfect. (Rather good, perhaps, but far from perfect. ;) ) Secondly, I'm just saying what comes into my mind when I read the story. It's entire possible if I went back to review some of my previous writing, I'd see some mistakes as well.

The thing is, I just don't feel much emotion from what's going on. I don't feel like Tali is really shocked, or if she's tempted, or if she has second thoughts, or if she finally thinks about all the dark desires she's kept hidden...she's just sort of like "Oh...okay". I want to feel more emotion! ;)

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Mon Aug 01, 2011 7:22 pm
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